Mickey and Minnie

Posted By: Adult Jokster - More Jokes like this: Celebrity Jokes
Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court.

The judge said, "Mickey, I'm sorry. I can't grant you a divorce on the grounds of insanity. Minnie seems quite sane."

Mickey said, "I didn't say she was insane, I said she was fucking Goofy!"

The 7 dwarves in Rome

Posted By: Adult Jokster - More Jokes like this: Celebrity Jokes, Religious Jokes
The seven dwarves are in Rome and they go on a tour of the city. After a while they go to the Vatican and meet the Pope. Grumpy, for once, seems to have a lot to say; he keeps asking the pontiff questions about the church, and in particular the nuns.

"Your Holiness, do you have any really short nuns?"

"No, my son, all our nuns are at least 1,70 meters tall."

"Are you sure? I mean, you wouldn't have any nuns that are, say, about my height? Maybe a little shorter?"

"I'm afraid not. Why do you ask?"

"No reason" (pause) "Positive? Nobody in a dark suit who is about 75-90 cm tall?"

"I'm sure."

"Okay. Thanks anyway."

Grumpy looks dejected at this news, and the pope wonders why; so he listens to the dwarves as they leave the building:

"What did he say? What did he say?" chant the other six dwarves.

Grumpy says: "He said, they don't have any short nuns."

And the other six dwarves start chanting "Grumpy fucked a penguin! Grumpy fucked a penguin! ...."

Pinnochio

Posted By: Adult Jokster - More Jokes like this: Celebrity Jokes
One day Pinnochio came to Gepeto with a problem. He said, "Thanks a lot Gepeto for making me and everything, but I need advice. Every time I have sex with my girlfriend, she gets splinters, how can I stop this?"

"Well" said Gepeto, "Have you tried sandpaper?"

"That's a good idea", and so Pinnochio left.

A couple of weeks later Gepeto questioned Pinnochio, "How is the problem going with your girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend?" ,said Pinnochio, "Who needs a girlfriend when you have sandpaper?"

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